There's a classic episode of Seinfeld in which a doctor tells Elaine she's "breathtaking." Not more than 30 seconds later, the same doctor says the same thing about a baby who is universally acknowledged as hideous. Naturally, Elaine questions about whom the doctor is lying, her or the hideous baby.
Every time I get my hair cut, my fabulous hairdresser, Rick, tells me that I'm "looking fabulous." Not supposing that he had reason to lie, I'm always flattered. Yesterday afternoon, while waiting for my appointment, a less-than-attractive woman walked in. She had thinning hair, painted-on eyebrows and an outfit that was at least two sizes two small. As soon as Rick saw her, he said, "Hey, darlin'! Lookin' fabulous!"
So who is he lying to? Me or the lady without eyebrows?! How often do we accept compliments without realizing that, no, we aren't "breathtaking," and, no, we are not "looking fabulous"? And in the grand scheme of things, does the true motive behind the compliment matter if it makes us feel just a little better about ourselves?
4 comments:
Oh my.
He's not lying to you, my dear! LUV, M
He's telling you the truth and her the truth. You look fabulous for you, and she looks fabulous for her. Your level of attainable fabulosity is just higher than hers.
My friend Candi often greets me with "Hey there, pretty girl." I had the same kind of moment when I heard her say the same thing to someone resembling the woman at your salon. Even though I never believe her, that moment made me feel as though the compliment was cheapened. I have to believe she says it out of love, though. We see the people we love differently than the ones we encounter on the street.
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