Conservative Constitution

There was a wonderful article in the Opinion section of the Washington Post last weekend.  I can't get its "Preamble" out of my head:

We, the Real Americans, in order to form a more God-Fearing Union, establish Justice as we see it, Defeat Health-Care Reform, and Preserve and Protect our Property, our Guns and our Right Not to Pay Taxes, do ordain and establish this Conservative Constitution for the United States of Real America.

The rest of the "Conservative Constitution" is worth a read.

Women's rights are human rights

My Speech students are giving their final speeches of the semester this week. Their assignment was to visit this site and present one of these great American speeches. While I was previewing the speeches that the students chose, I was reminded of one of my very favorite speeches, given by then-First Lady Hillary Clinton at a United Nations' Women's Conference in Beijing:



The message is still so relevant today, a fact which is simultaneously uplifting and discouraging.

Governor Palin? It's your editor on line 1.

I have to give a huge shout-out to Abbi who said "If we don't laugh, we'll cry" about this Vanity Fair posting. Ironically--or perhaps, appropriately--I laughed until I cried when I read it. Click the image for the full-size, three-page version.

In fairness to Governor Palin, I think most of us would sound like this if we spoke off the cuff. On the other hand, there are few things funnier to me than political humor and grammar humor. Throw them together with a touch of historical humor, and I'm down for the count.

Who's mad with the money now?

Jon Stewart of The Daily Show and Jim Cramer of Mad Money have had an ongoing dispute for the last few weeks. One of the reasons I love The Daily Show so much is that, unlike "real" news shows, they're in a unique position to call people out for what they really are and say what the rest of us are thinking. And the fact that Jon Stewart is much more intelligent and clever than some give him credit for makes these types of showdowns all the more enjoyable.

Check out the recent interview below which brought the Stewart/Cramer feud to a head. Heads up for an F-bomb or two.

Jim Cramer Interview, Part 1

Jim Cramer Interview, Part 2

Jim Cramer Interview, Part 3

Partisan politics? Yes, please.

In the past few weeks, I've heard much about the dissolving honeymoon period of the Obama presidency. The attempt at bipartisanship was an apparent failure, we're back to the same old Washington infighting and I have to ask: what's wrong with that?

While I may not agree with those of the minority party, this open dialogue certainly is a welcome departure from the "if you're not with us, you're against us" attitude of the last eight years. Besides, partisanship is hardly a new phenomenon. This piece from NPR's "On the Media" is one of the best explanations I've heard for why we will always have--and perhaps why we will always need--partisan bickering:

Inaugural guilt

I was overwhelmed with terrible guilt on my way to school this morning. I didn't make it to any inauguration festivities over the weekend, despite living just 20 miles away. I was wondering if I'd be kicking myself 20 years from now that I was missing the inauguration itself, too.

"A celebration like none other," one NPR commentator said.

"The energy is palpable," said another.

"I should've skipped school," I thought.

Then, as I was sitting at my desk, trying to figure out what to do with another day of shortened classes (seriously, there wasn't even any snow this time), it hit me. Instead of wallowing in self-pity or guilt, I'd turn today's history into a life lesson.

In my English 10 classes today, my students wrote letters to the president. I showed them how to write a respectful letter, even when writing to disagree or complain. I explained that part of their duty of living in a free country is using the skills we learn in English class to communicate with those in power.

Inevitably, this assignment was greeted with a few of those expected questions, which were followed by my less-than-appreciated questions and replies:

"Can I write to McCain instead?"
"Is he the president?"

"I can't vote. Do I have to do this?"
"Do you live in this country?"

"I don't feel strongly about any issues."
"Then write about the problem of apathy among America's youth."

"If this is a free country, I'm deciding not to write this letter."
"Ah, but this classroom is a benevolent dictatorship. Write."

Overall, I was quite pleased with the care and concern with which my sophomores wrote to the new president. The spirit and excitement they showed while exercising their democracy more than made up for the fact that I wasn't among the 2 million frozen bodies on the Mall today. Even if they didn't agree with our new president, my students still wrote with the expectation that their voices will be heard. I can't think of a better way to celebrate today's historic change.

Morphing presidents

One of my nuns sent me this video today. History geek that I am, I think it's great.

"Barack who? Tell him I'm not here."

This is another one of those news stories that would be funny if it wasn't actually true. After hanging up on the president-elect twice, Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen issued the press release below, complete with misspellings of both "Barack" and "Emanuel." One would think that the Communications staff for someone with the name "Ros-Lehtinen" would be used to double-checking the spelling of names. Regardless, her staff may want to learn how to spell "Barack" and "Emanuel" before January 20th.

"December 3, 2008

"Miami, Florida --- Cong. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen thought it was a hoax when President-Elect Barak (sic) Obama called her twice today and she proceeded to hang up on him, twice.

"Ros-Lehtinen was working in her South Florida district when she received a call on her cell from a Chicago based phone number and an aide informed her that President-Elect Obama wished to speak to her. A gentleman sounding like Obama introduced himself when Ros-Lehtinen cut him off and said that 'I’m sorry but I think this is a joke from one of the South Florida radio stations known for these pranks' and hung up.

"A short time later, Cong. and Chief of Staff designate Rahm Emmanuel (sic) called Ileana and stated 'Ileana, I cannot believe that you hung up on the President-Elect.' Ros-Lehtinen told Rahm that she didn’t believe the call was legitimate and hung up on Emmanuel (sic). A staffer to the Congresswoman informed her that Chairman Howard Berman of the Foreign Affairs Committee needed to speak with her urgently. When Chairman Berman called, Ros-Lehtinen urged him to recount a story only both of them would know, which he did, and told her that she had indeed hung up on the President-Elect.

"The Congresswoman then received another call from Obama and he told her 'It is very funny that you have twice hung up on me,' to which she responded that South Florida radio stations are notorious for these jokes. Obama told her that in Chicago they also have prank calls. Ileana told Obama that 'you are either very gracious to reach out in such a bipartisan manner or had run out of folks to call if you are truly calling me and Saturday Night Live could use a good Obama impersonator like you.' After she congratulated him for his victory and pledged to work together on behalf of all Americans, Ros-Lehtinen asked Obama to please consult with Senator Bob Menendez and Congressman Albio Sires on Cuba policy and to rely on Secretary of State designate Clinton on Israel, two issues about which Ros-Lehtinen feels passionately.

"Ros-Lehtinen talked to Hillary Clinton by phone yesterday and also discussed Cuba and Israel."

Fireside Chats

I'm a huge FDR fan, and it doesn't take a genius to realize that I'm a bit of an Obama fan, too. So I'm loving the marriage of the originator of the weekly presidential address (i.e., the fireside chat) with the king of YouTube (1,800 Obama videos on YouTube have been viewed more than 110 million times).

The fireside chat comes to YouTube. What a great time to be alive.

Mr. President

On Tuesday, I drove to Pittsburgh to spend my birthday and this historic election day with Jessica, my birthday and election partner. As the clock in the bar ticked down to 11:00 p.m. Eastern time, we all counted down the seconds with the anticipation of New Year's Eve, Superbowl Sunday, two birthdays and an election, all rolled in to one. Fighting back tears, Jessica and I held each other until we realized we didn't have to hold back the tears. I looked around, and we weren't the only ones crying--far from it. Strangers were hugging, crying and holding each other. I bawled my way through his acceptance speech:



After the speech, I went out into the street and saw people pouring from the surrounding houses. One woman ran down the street, yelling, "I can't be alone! I have to hug someone!" I shouted back, "I'll hug you!" and we stood together, hugging, crying, celebrating, rejoicing. When I went back inside, the bartenders were giving away free drinks, which Jessica and I gladly accepted (purely in the spirit of the celebratory and momentous occasion, of course):

I first came in contact with President-elect Obama over three years ago when I was still working on Capitol Hill. I went to a Veterans' Affairs subcommittee hearing on veterans' employment issues. I was one of maybe six staffers and visitors in attendance. The meeting was like any other until the Chair recognized the Junior Senator from Illinois. Senator Obama leaned forward to speak, and he had the room in his hand with his first words. "How can we be talking about employing veterans," he asked, "when there are thousands of homeless veterans in my home state of Illinois alone?" He continued to speak with such passion and such clarity, that I thought it was a shame there were only six of us there to hear it. I also remember thinking that, because there were only six of us there, he must really must believe what he's saying. This isn't an act; this isn't political posturing. This guy really believes what he's saying.

I saw an interview with Colin Powell yesterday that helped bring everything full-circle for me, especially this quote: "President-elect Obama did not put himself forward as an African American president. He put himself forward as an American who happened to be black--who happened to be African American. And that ought to come after the title."

Of course, yesterday's Doonsbury hit the mark pretty well, too:
Here's to President-elect Obama, a great leader who happens to be black...and white.

Vote

Why vote today? Although there's really no excuse not to (as evidenced by the woman with the cast in a wheelchair at my polling place this morning), here's a brief, albeit not exhaustive, list:

1. Because 90 years ago, a person like me couldn't vote.
2. Because I was the minority at my polling place this morning. Not since my mom and I stumbled into the NAACP convention in Minneapolis have I felt so outnumbered.
3. Because of the 50-year-old black man I met waiting in line to vote for two hours this morning who said, "I finally have someone to vote for."
4. Because all the 18-year-old girls going to vote for the first time will see the name "Sarah" on a major ticket instead of "Dick" or "George."
5. Because 151 years ago, a black man wasn't even a person, and in a few hours, he may be the person.
6. Because I will ask for nothing else for my birthday if you spend a few minutes at the polls today.
7. Because if you don't, you have to sit down and shut up for the next four years.

Why will you vote today?

Edit to #5 at 1:30 a.m. Eastern time: He is the person. Eat your heart out, Supreme Court of 1857!

Don't vote?

Videos like these make me wish I was going to teach American Government instead of English:





Click here to visit the link in the videos and find out where you vote.

Living History

A while back, I wrote about what progress we've made in this country recently. I'm so proud to be living in this era so alive with the anticipation of change and so filled with demonstrations of our potential for great progress. I often wonder how I'll describe this particular moment in time with my children and their children.

Then, I hear stories like this one, and I realize that, in my very short and sheltered lifetime, I've really seen nothing at all. Regardless of how this election turns out, I hope Mrs. Cooper makes it to November 4th.

John McCain, you are no friend of mine

John McCain used the phrase "my friends" or "my friend" 23 times in last night's debate. For heaven's sake, he only said "earmark" five times. But John McCain and I are not friends. In fact, I suspect he is not friends with a majority of the people who watched or listened to the debate last night. I find that type of forced casual dialogue interminably patronizing. It reminds me of the sales clerk who uses my first name after reading it on my credit card. "Thanks, Rachel," she says. "I'm sorry," I want to reply. "Have we been introduced?"

Voting gives me a warm fuzzy

And stories and images such as these from today's Washington Post just about move me to tears:

"In Columbus, college students pitched tents overnight so they could be first to vote. Advocates in Cleveland shuttled voters from homeless shelters to the polls. In Akron, voters arrived as soon as the doors were unlocked and waited in folding chairs for their turn."

Voting groupies! These are my kind of people. I get an adrenaline rush every time I cast my ballot, even in off years or primary races. There's something about the process that just plain does it for me. Then again, I would also be a permanent juror if Anne Arundel County would let me.

Mmm...the democratic process.

Aahhh...the judicial system.

Matt for President!

There are so many reasons why that will never happen. The primary reason, according to NPR, is because my Matt is follically challenged. Never in the history of the United States have we elected a bald man (or woman, I suppose) to our highest office. Yes, Gerald Ford was balding, but he also wasn't elected. In this year of millions of cracks in the glass ceiling, bald men (yes, and women) are still the forgotten minority--cast aside as the unsung heroes in the perpetual fight against discrimination in America. Why, even Vice Presidential candidate Joe Biden, a hero of the "everyman," used to be bald until he abandoned his hairless brethren:

Conversely (and quite fascinating, I might add), Soviets/Russians have a rich history of accepting--nay, uplifting--the hairless among them. In fact, they have a most peculiar pattern, as noted by Steve Jones, head of the Biology Department at University College in London:

Lenin: Bald
Stalin: Hairy
Khrushchev: Bald
Brezhnev: Hairy
Andropov: Bald
Chernenko: Hairy
Gorbachev: Bald
Yeltsin: Hairy
Putin: Bald(ing)
Medvedev: Hairy

So, this must mean that Russia's next president has to be bald. There are a few hurdles in our way, but I see no reason why Matt can't defect to Russia, become a foreign national, and be elected.

Matt for President!

Progress

On August 26, 1920, American women secured the right to vote:

Exactly 88 years later, on August 26, 2008:

On August 28, 1963, Martin Luther King, Jr. shared his dream with America:

Exactly 45 years later, on August 28, 2008:

Back into 'Blackness'

I've been thinking about an article in the Style section of today's Post ever since I finished reading it.

The piece is a wonderful commentary from Pulitzer-prize winning journalist Robin Givhan, and it stems from John McLaughlin's "Oreo" comment of about a week ago. That inappropriate (and terribly out-of-date! Why does this guy even have a current events show?) comment has brought back to the forefront (has it ever left?) the issue of whether Obama is "black enough" or "too black."

This statement by the author, while accurate, is also rather ironic: "It would be splendid if the man could simply just be in the same way as presumptive Republican nominee John McCain." By writing this article, poignant as it is, Givhan fails to let the issue of race just be.

Givhan contends that the conversation about Obama's "blackness" should be shelved. And while I agree that a debate over whether he's "black enough" or "too black" is ridiculous, perhaps discussion of his race in general isn't so inappropriate. When my mom risked her life in the 1960's to help blacks in the deep south register to vote, I doubt she thought that any of those individuals would ever have a viable run for the White House. Now, just 40 years later, Obama's historical feat should be recognized. The trade-off, then, is that he--and, by extension, his race--will never simply be.

This could mean that bigots like the primary voters in West Virginia who voted for Hillary because "they can't stand the thought of a black man telling a white man what to do" will turn out in droves to vote against Obama this fall. But those same people turned out in droves with fire hoses during the freedom marches and the bus boycotts, and they turned out in droves to threaten freedom fighters like my mom. But that didn't stop progress. If anything, it fueled it.

While the black enough/too black debate (which sounds like a racist "tastes great/less filling") can be shelved, I'm in no hurry to let Obama's historic race for the presidency just be.

Closet Catholics

There was a great article by Anthony Stevens-Arroyo in the Washington Post yesterday about Obama, the "closet Catholic." I enjoyed it not because I think the nuns I work for would love a convert in the White House, but because it highlights the wonderful works done by religious charitable organizations. Too often we hear about zealous Christians proselytizing and preaching the "if you're not with us you're against us" gospel. But actually living the gospel isn't about pointing fingers and looking for ways to exclude people. It's about living life as Jesus lived it--by caring for each other and loving the least among us as if they were family. I'm glad that Obama recognizes the Catholic Charities model and all the great work it does to give life to Jesus' message.

With that said, I don't know if one needs to be a "closet Catholic" in order to know that the Catholic church does a lot of good for a lot of people. I was raised in a liberal Lutheran tradition, and I was nervous when I first began to work for a congregation of nuns that we'd never agree on social issues. But I soon realized that the "Pro Life" issue is such a tiny piece of their lives as faithful Catholics. I also learned that "Pro Life" includes an end to war and starvation, as well as respect for life once its grown and needs help. Many of my nuns, as well as many Catholics who don't get the press, are socially liberal people. They believe in living the mission of Jesus by helping one another, especially the poorest and most destitute among us. I'm no "closet Catholic," but I am inspired every day by the selfless work of my nuns, the people at Catholic Charities and millions of other unsung, liberal Catholics.

My "to duel" list

I love a well-written news story with historical illusions. Add a grammatical reference to said story, and I'm hooked. There was a brilliant article in the Washington Post this morning that did just that.

Although, the point of the article wasn't actually the comma (though any self-respecting English major would effectively argue it was the crux of the argument). The article painted an image of a modern society in which arguments are settled with dueling pistols as opposed to dueling words, calling in to question the heretofore accepted "pen is mightier than the sword" argument and not-so-subtlety commenting on yesterday's Supreme Court decision.

Consequently, the article made me question what other modern battles could be more effectively waged with violence than words. Instead of months of rhetoric leading to a general election on November 4th, perhaps Obama and McCain could arm wrestle for the presidency. Instead of arguing with my husband about whose turn it is to empty the dishwasher or take care of that clogged drain, maybe we should dust off our dueling swords. And instead of debating the second amendment, perhaps Justices Scalia and Breyer should have performed the ultimate cliché by standing back to back, marching twenty paces and turning to fire. Why not? As the author says: "Gauntlet, consider yourself thrown."